ENG 3U: Ask Mr. Pedrech

Good Advice for Hard Times by Daniel Y. Go, via Flickr
Good Advice for Hard Times by Daniel Y. Go, via Flickr

Did you know that I have started my own advice column? It is true. It has only been online for a few weeks, but I have already received some interesting posts. Admittedly, most of the posts are about History, English grammar, and old video games, but once in a while, I receive some posts from people who are having problems in their private lives. Here are a few of my favourite; perhaps you can help me answer them?

Hi, Mr. Pedrech. I am a longtime reader, first time poster. I am in love with someone, but that particular someone sees me as nothing but a friend. In fact, my “friend” has asked me to describe the person I love in some detail. The problem is that if I describe my love interest, my “friend” might figure out who I am talking about!

What should I do? Signed, Friend-zoned in Fresno

Hi Mr. Pedrech. I’ve got this friend (of the opposite sex, no less) who constantly runs down my gender. Apparently, we are weak, fickle, and shallow. I know I am not these things. Should I call this person out for this behavior?

Stereotyped in St. Thomas

Hi Mr. Pedrech. So, my friends and I occasionally like to play pranks. One of our favourite techniques is to find someone who is self-absorbed and conceited to poke fun at. Well, we have found the perfect target: a self-important  (and often mean) servant who thinks his wealthy, witty, and beautiful employer who is half his age has a thing for him. 

We need some help figuring out how to “get” this servant. We don’t really want to torture him; we just want to take him down a few notches. Our plan is to write a letter in his boss’ handwriting containing a request that will put him in his place. We could probably get him to do almost anything, but we need to come up with something that will really make him regret being so bossy and mean to those around him. Any suggestions?

Vengeful in Vegas

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